sonder

written 4/4/25

8.2 billion people experienced today in a different way. 

I love people watching, but not many understand. I love sitting in places where my thoughts could either find serenity, hushed into a tranquil rhythm or one that churns over and over again wondering what people’s little routine are. on the airplane I’d consistently opt for the window seat and would even pay for it, a deliberate choice to immerse myself in the vastness below, an intentional act to feel small against the grand terrain unfolding beneath me. no one talks about the unique peacefulness in the airborne solitude-no destination demanding my presence, no tasks clamoring for attention, no faces to meet, no conversations to engage. I am simultaneously unreachable and unapproachable, yet paradoxically boundless. amidst the clouds, I find a sanctuary where I can read, write, watch, think, and observe, embracing the rare gift of physical stillness.

I’d say I understand the word sonder but truly I’m unable to wrap my head around it. what do you mean 8 billion people have their own private lives just as dramatic and big as ours in this little world we all share, that we are so unaware of? we pass each other on the street, in different places, different continents, maybe smile but never think of them again and the same as them to us. 

anyway, some thoughts I recall as I people watched:

“they look adorable! I wonder how they met”

“she looks so nonchalant, what are the odds that its her birthday?”

“he’s eating alone, I wonder if this is just a one-off thing or he enjoys his alone time”

it’s absolutely insane that 8 billion people have their own lives thinking about their own family and friends doing their own things. do I even know my friends at this point? we are so small when you think about it, the world will go on without us. we are.. nobody. no one in power at least. we’ve created our own bubble that we live in and 8 billion people have also done that, that we know nothing about it. we all have different perspectives and that's what makes our world go on. we hear songs differently, we see pictures differently and we feel differently.

in a state of sonder, each of us is at once a hero, a supporting cast member, and an extra in overlapping stories.